Cheese Ball

I like to consider myself as a fairly level headed person. I am a working professional and because work takes up most of my days, I try to come across as professional. However {and let me add that in my case it is a big however}, I have a really nerdy, cheesy, call it what you will, side. A side that is a bit contrary to the day to day side I present to the world.

I have an admittedly odd sense of humor, I tend to bust out in {uncoordinated} dance or song in stores, my house, and especially in the car (car dancing is an experience I tend to share mostly with my youngest sister), I am not the most coordinated and I am what many in my family call, a dork. Guilty.

I would like to say I’m admittedly a dork and don’t care who knows, but that is wholly untrue. In the past I have held back this side of me because I didn’t think a guy would find me as appealing if he knew what a huge nerd/dork/cheese ball/whatever, I really am. I can honestly say that maybe only 1 serious boyfriend in the past has seen this side of me. Maybe. {Yes, that is a horrible fact but one I am facing head on today}. And I should add, look where it has gotten me.

I don’t think I am alone in that I hold back the seemingly less glamorous sides of myself. But how strong can the relationship possibly be if I am not being true to my dorky/cheesy self? And whose to say those "less glamorous" sides of myself aren't the ones that he thinks are the best and cutest parts of me. I think it would be amazing, and a bit ground breaking in my case, to find someone who helps me relax from the start. A guy with whom I can feel so at ease that I am not only not afraid to show this side of me, but with whom I want to show it to and share it with.

I’m truly looking forward to that day when I can find that Mr. Future Someone who not only helps me break out of my shell, but loves me for me –all the dorky/cheesy parts included.