punched. in. the. stomach.

That is how my brother described the feeling when he found out his ex-girlfriend was engaged. That is how I felt a couple of weeks ago when I found out an ex-boyfriend was engaged. Like the wind had been knocked out of me and it wouldn't come back. I would be fine and then it would hit me again.

He said he wasn't ready for marriage, that he may never be ready.

Apparently it was just me he wasn't ready to marry.

It isn't that I still want to be with him. I can firmly state that I don't and have long since moved on, but the pain is that he got it. He got what I have wanted for a long time. Something he didn't think he wanted. Why him? Why is he the lucky one?

My brother asked me if somewhere deep down I hope he isn't as happy with her as he was with me and that he has regrets. Of course! That's so awful to say, but it's true. But then I saw a picture of him after the engagement and realized, he is happier. Duh.

I've been having this pitty party for about 2 weeks, then I actually got punched in the stomach with the stomach flu. That will teach me I guess. ;P

A New Direction

About a year ago I was at a party. A guy I had met before was there and waived me over to him. Of course I was a little excited, a guy actually remembered me and wanted to talk to me again; so I headed in his direction only to notice that he was talking to another girl. No big deal, it’s a party. But then he looked at me, said “hold on”, turned his back on me and got the phone number of the other girl. Now it isn’t that he was hitting on two girls at the same time that bothered me, it was that I have to endure a guy hitting on two girls at the same time. Seriously! I'm in my 30's, still single and this is what I have to deal with? Then and there I thought I should start blogging about my dating experiences, or lack thereof.

After thinking about it for a while I decided that nobody wanted to hear about my experiences so I talked my brother into starting a blog that posted events and activities for single people around Salt Lake Valley. That bombed. Neither of us were too enthused about hunting down activities. The blog went stagnant and unattended. That is, until now. I still don’t know if anyone wants to read about my experiences or those I hear about, but heck, I’m almost 35 and have had more dating experiences than I care to think about so why not share those and maybe, just maybe, there is someone out there who will find a little humor in sharing the dating life of a single girl in Salt Lake City. So here goes nothing…